I cannot, cannot take it any more. I’m not talking about football. It may appear I have been so absorbed with football I haven’t even had time to write a single BLOG. (Or maybe, just maybe I have been busy with this thing called a mom’s life - running around, laundry, school stuff, and oh, for those of us nutty enough, a job. ).
What I am talking about is gum chewing. It is a national embarrassment and it has to stop. When I see someone chomping away on a piece of gum I want to scream. Has anyone looked in the mirror when they chew gum? If you are a regular gum chewer I encourage you - just watch yourself for three minutes, if you can even take it that long.
I discovered how ridiculous I looked years ago. I was in college at my hairdressers, and she had me turned away from the mirror while she was working on my awesome 80’s hair do.
The whole time I’m chatting away about my college life, as if she had never heard a single one of my stories before. She probably wanted to cut a bald spot into the back of my head. She was a hairdresser on a college campus for crying out loud. Anyway, I was chewing on a piece of gum as I always did back then. Suddenly she spun me around, and I was still talking/chewing/talking/chewing and for the life of me I kept thinking - who is that flipping moron?? Then I realized it was me. Cow chewing cud. Yep. So from that day forward, no more gum chewing.
I discovered how ridiculous I looked years ago. I was in college at my hairdressers, and she had me turned away from the mirror while she was working on my awesome 80’s hair do.
The whole time I’m chatting away about my college life, as if she had never heard a single one of my stories before. She probably wanted to cut a bald spot into the back of my head. She was a hairdresser on a college campus for crying out loud. Anyway, I was chewing on a piece of gum as I always did back then. Suddenly she spun me around, and I was still talking/chewing/talking/chewing and for the life of me I kept thinking - who is that flipping moron?? Then I realized it was me. Cow chewing cud. Yep. So from that day forward, no more gum chewing.
Don’t get me wrong, this is not an anti gum blog. Gum serves a very important purpose. To freshen breath or take a bad taste out of your mouth. Besides that, there only two people who should chew gum for more than 5 minutes - Michael Jordan, and girls in New York City. Other than that - chew and remove. Everyone knows most gum loses its flavor after 5 minutes. But even for the occasional brand that tastes like spearmint even longer, I ask you, WHY?
Take a look around you this next week and see if you agree. We can't be taken seriously as a society with the constant jawing. The campaign starts here and now. Stop the madness. Who’s with me?
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